I think in a lot of ways I am the biggest obstacle to my own success. I’m working physically towards becoming the person I am in my head but I’m realizing more and more that I don’t think of myself as that person. Its as separate from my identity as SJ or any of the various other people that I find myself wishing I was more like.
I spend so much time waiting for validation from outside sources, but before I can ever hope for that to come, I have to validate myself.
With the approach of winter equinox, and the gradual returning of the light, its a great time to lay to rest the thoughts and behaviors that no longer serve. So for me it is a time to start living as the ideal me. Not to say “I’ll be like this when I reach my fitness goals”, but to actually live every day from this very second onward as my truest best most confident self.
It’s time to take care of my body and feed my spirit. Time to walk with my head high, dress how I like, be who I am, and not care what anyone else...even J... has to say about it.
So in addition to my dedication to my dance and spiritual goals, I am going to work this year towards making the me that I project to the world and the inner vision come into alignment.
AND, as long as I’m making resolutions... there is another piece of the puzzle that I am missing. While I have many friends, I have a tendency to keep them at arms length, there is not one person other than J, that I really let close enough to be a true confidant. I need to change that and really work on building my relationships with other people and letting them in. Its time to find a true best friend instead of having a myriad of close acquaintances.
Food for thought heading into the weekend.
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